2021 is finally over, but it still doesn’t feel real….it’s m.. (OnlyFans)

2021 is finally over, but it still doesn’t feel real….it’s my birthday month, but it still doesn’t feel real…..all I can think of is that you are gone now, but it still doesn’t feel real... How can something so inevitable still hurt so much when it happens? 
I’m struggling. Struggling to find value in anything I do right now. I wish there was a pause button on life for moments like this….struggling to do what is “normal” or what I used to do before….when is it going to start feeling real? 

Last night I dreamt that I traveled back in time to spend more time with you knowing that we wouldn’t have as much time as we thought we would…that felt real….but it was just a dream and now I’m awake and you are still gone. No time machines here. Only that you won’t be in pain ever again and you deserve that…
I love you forever and like you for always. Forever in our hearts and forever missed Grandma 💜