Sometimes, I see couples or married people on onlyfans worki.. (OnlyFans)

Sometimes, I see couples or married people on onlyfans working really hard together and it makes me happy. 💙 They’re a team. 💙 They’re best friends. They clearly love one another. They look out after one another. They make it look easy. The hubbies or internet boyfriends even throw competitions that promotes their waifu. It’s so beautiful. ♥️😭

I asked him to help me make dating profiles or social media profiles for me to branch out worldwide since I’m banned in a lot of places online. I haven’t learned how to behave how other people want to all the time. I just want to be me and explore like I’m a 6 foot white man or something else with power. I’m still learning to love in a world that doesn’t love me unless I’m providing some sexual or entertaining gratification for them. Those interactions hurt me. I’m not set up for success. I’ve been reported for saying no to men or not saying anything at all. (Why I stopped buying tinder and bumble stock)  …. I would feel less crazy and uptight  if I could just have someone at least screen my messages to protect my mental health and he just… didn’t give a fuck. 

He just left with all of his stuff and I’m okay with it. I feel like I shouldn’t have to beg someone who cares about me to give me a hand. God didn’t make me to read this many messages and I just don’t even want to see a single s*at or creepy request. I’m human. I don’t think I’m asking for that much and he made me feel like I’m asking him to sacrifice an arm. Ugh. 

Especially if I’ve been paying for everything and let him fuck me in the ass once. Come on. I know this job isn’t cute like Suzy at the corner bakery but it could be the greatest opportunity if you’ve got the gonads for it. I’m worth it. I know I am. Even if no one in real life sees it except me. 

I need a team of people bigger and better than me. Im spread thin and haven’t even made friendships this past 5 years because I can’t finish work or take care of home. I’m cooking, cleaning, taking care of dogs that aren’t even mine, managing my self care/self love journey with no support system,  taking over the world, just….??? I don’t even know. Whatever. I don’t care anymore. Lol. 🤣😭😇

I’m done. I only want my internet family that pours into my cup and I’m willing to give them everything. 

Oh, and I just remembered I’m on a competition one @cupcakepromotions. Please toss this awesome page a follow and a vote for me and @stonergoddess4201. Love you. Thanks for letting me “talk”. Lol.