Who is the most popular guy at the swingers club? The guy wh.. (OnlyFans)

Who is the most popular guy at the swingers club? The guy who can carry a drink in each hand and a dozen donuts hands-free. Just saying.

I banged Patrick again. Kind of. He went soft. It's been a bit since that happened. I feel bad for him, in his 20's. That's going to leave a mark. I tried to get him hard, but he didn't want anything to do with that. We were doing what he wanted. He was fucking me on the kitchen counter. I let him be completely in charge. He initiated it, and it was hard as a rock to start, and about 30 seconds into it, I knew we had an issue. It got floppy and wouldn't stay in. Then it totally deflated into a shriveled weenie. He yanked on it and said something about Claritin D being the cause. I don't know...I don't have a cock. As I said, I would have worked his dick for an hour if he would have let me. I like doing that. Even if it doesn't get hard, it's enjoyable just having a dick to play with. But...he didn't want anything to do with that. I think he thought he could just hang around for a few hours and try again. Sadly, I had things to do. So I sent him and his super soft dick on their merry way. Then I called Scott and fucked his dick into oblivion. A girl has to do what a girl has to do. I talked to Patrick this morning. I'll see him again tonight. See if he gets it all squared away.

I actually had a guy tell me this weekend that he was going to give me something six inches long that would make me very happy. I said, "That sounds like a hundred-dollar bill...I'll take it." He said it wasn't what he meant. I didn't talk to him after that. Say stupid things, and win stupid prizes.

Did you ever play "Tug O Whore?" I have been the "Ho" in the equation more than a few times. What is "Tug O Whore?" you ask. It's when 2 guys fight for the attention of a woman who seems primed and ready for cock. You know...someone like me. Lots of times, it's a draw, and both guys go home with their own dick in their hand. The only thing they win is "tugging" their own dick till it spits. When there is a winner...well, there is no one sure way to win that kind of contest. It could be looks, personality, mood...a thousand other things. So it's basically a toss-up when it comes to a winner. I have played "Tug O Cock" more than a few times. I have to say I probably pulled a draw for most of the contests. I have probably lost as many as I have won.  Women take a loss harder than guys do. They get mean about it. So I avoid the Tug O Cock battles. I consider that a sound policy. I prefer to stick to the cock that is already on my side of the tug line.

The worst thing I said this week. I was listening to a girl tell everyone how she had a tremendous sex drive. I said, "Sure you do. He lives 80 miles away." She didn't get it. Some of you won't either. I'm just saying. I thought it was pretty quick.