Untitled (Fansly)

I was today years old when I learned that Helen of Troy WAS NOT A REAL PERSON!

When I got this gold bikini I had visions of Troy (a la Diane Kruger circa 2002) with laurels for my long, wavy hair and some sort of toga-like beach wrap to go with it. 

#fyp #milf #mombod #natural #bigboobs #ass #longhair #bikini #swimsuit #bigtits

Well, wouldn’t you know that as I sat in the pool brushing up on my Ancient Greek history knowledge, I learned that Helen of Troy was married to of King of Sparta (he’s also not real, but Sparta was), and, due to her beauty was abducted by Paris of Troy (Paris wasn’t real, Troy was an ancient city in modern-day Turkey). 

Okay, now I’m roped in. So the entire Trojan War, the topic of many a Greek tragedy, the narrative voice behind Homer’s Iliad, and Odyssey, of numerous characters and plays and mythology is ALL COMPLETELY MADE UP. 

Blew my mind. I was almost concerned I’d simply consumed one too many cans of High Noon as I sat in the pool reading this but nope, it’s just mythology. 

Sure, there are some historical events that informed these pieces of art and literature but by and large it is just simply legend. 💫